The Rules.

The embrace of the dark, feeling like shit is probably the best feeling ever, it’s always something that i avoid but also research, something that has been stalking me my all life, i feel i can’t live without it, very similar to your first love, it’s there, wherever you’re going, you can see some signs of it, you try to ignore it sometimes but it becomes impossible to the point where you just have to embrace it.

The fact that you can realise what you’re avoiding makes you stronger, a bit cliché indeed, i feel like i’m quoting spiderman, but hey some of my readers are brainless useless waste of mother nature so i have to entertain them even if they send me messages like «  You’re a fucking cunt » Well, someday i’ll find you and we’ll see who’s the cunt.

After all, before being at the top, you have to seduce the mass, which is more easy that one might think, basically, have a look and be able to talk about what matters to those people, and they’ll think that you’re a godsend, if you’re good at it. The Art of mass manipulation is something that you can’t take lightly. You can notice i’ve put an A at the « art » to show my respect to it. Some incredible artists have been living in the past but didn’t have a clue when it comes to sell yourself, some were talentless fuckers but knew.
Even nowaday as you’re reading, there is an artist who didn’t eat for 2 days because he’s living his art too fully, lost in his madness which was at first his only way to avoid his harrowing sensibilty. With times it became without him realising, his own tomb.

That’s when i come in, if you’re an artist (or pretty much everything) but you’re a talentless fucker when it comes to you, well that article is for you !

Be tall, beautiful and slim.

Yes i know that sounds pretty bad, but it has been proven that tall people are seen as more intelligent people ( how sad are we), they are paid better as well, so don’t be afraid to wear heels, even if you’re a guy, i myself am 1m74 but with heels, and my big hair, some people have thought in the past that i was at the very least 1m80 (people exaggerate a lot, probably because we’re just bored of our own existence, nothing else to say). Some famous people are the same size, but because they’re known, we think that they’re taller. If you’re very small, well go fuck yourself and die alone. Or become a tyran, that’s an other story.

Be beautiful… humm… Well i can’t help you here, sorry mate.

Actually for guys it’s easier, we’ll always be more remembered by our personnality than our physique, for girls, go to the bank, ask for money pretending that you’re going to open a business about feeding sheeps, get the money and redo your face, or have a diet, become skinny and you’ll be hot…

Be slim.

Take drugs. Or become poor. Or go live in Africa.

Be class !

Yes style is very important ! If you have a slipknot or nirvana t-shirt, maybe it’s time to put it in the bin and take a shit on it. Be elegant, and instead of looking like someone, look like yourself. Look at Serge Gainsbourg, he wasn’t the kind of guy where his ugliness could be discussed, he was ugly. But he had a face, i myself have a broken tooth because of a fight, i show it with pride, it’s part of my history. It’s what we call « It gives you character ! ». They usually say this to make you feel better, but hipocrisy’s good. Girls like faces that have a story, unlike guys that prefer a doll-face on girls.
 And after all, you have a face, a body, stop moaning about it, it’s a waste of time and even more narcissistic than me, so love yourself and maybe you’ll be able to love other people.

Wear glasses. Yeah that works pretty well, the bigger the frame, the higher your IQ will be to them. If you’re already smart, why not look even smarter ? I don’t know any person that is smart enough so go for it.
 Less is more… Fuck that, more is more. We’re in the 21 century. Look at Lady gaga, she loves meat. The earth don’t have long to live so give it some memories. ( Nah i don’t believe in 2012, i can’t wait to open a bottle of champagne that day, and shake it on people face’s, Formula 1 style. It’s obviously the perfect image of what a man should be. « Look at my cum ! It’s all over your face ! I’m such a man ! » )

Talk loudly and fast.

Apparently, the faster we talk, the faster our brain is suppose to work. It has been proven that people with fast handwriting are smarter, so forget your school handwriting, make it your own !
I myself have worked a lot on it. I have the most beautiful handwriting i’ve ever seen, because it’s esthetically nice to the eye but you can see my personnality through it, every line that i write is for me a confession, i feel at one with myself, it’s probably my favourite hobby, just so i can see me, in the past i've written the same word more than a hundred time in a row while observing the shape of the lines, an exquisite moment. The mirror shows me fuck all.
 Let it go without thinking of people not being able to understand it, if you’re important enough, believe me, they’ll make an effort.
Studying of handwriting used to be my obsession at the age of 13, then i discovered body language... If you can’t talk very fast for some reason, compensate with a rich body language and a gaze that would be able to stab someone’s soul through the eyes, i don’t want to tell you how to have this gaze. It took me years to be able to have, at my will, a powerful, intense gaze, you wouldn’t believe how easy it is to do.
People who talk loudly are seen as smarter, don’t talk in your beard, it inspires diarrhea coming out from an hemorroides-arse. Not something that you want. So express yourself ! That guy that you think is fucking cool and you wish to be him, well first ask him a fag (because you only have to idealize people that are « touchable » if i may say, not a celebrity. That’s just sad.) It’s important to have someone to look up to, it brings you up, age has nothing to do with it, people who might be tempted to say that after a while you're "mature" so you don't have to do all that shit, well go fuck yourself, how pretentious would it be to say that i can’t get better anymore? 
 There are lots of fascinating people living amoung us, make an effort to meet them, but avoid the cunts as you’re doing it.
 I am looking up to someone, probably not in the area that you think.

We only live 80years for the lucky ones, it's very short, there is no after life, we're nothing, why would we "stay" when dead? How do i know? Let's say that when i'll die, i'll be able to say i've lived my life and if reborn in a cat i'll say fair enough.
I'd be pretty pissed off to be reborn in a cow or whatever. If i'm wrong... I'll kiss your feet in front of everyone.
Have a destructive laugh!

Yes ! We can tell so much by the laugh of someone, it can give so much energy to someone else, or communicate a certain state of mind. I myself adapt my laugh according with who i am, it became natural, instinctif, a very animal thing to do. I’m like a wild lion that will roar louder in front of an elephant than if i was in front of a cat, actually i’d probably just take a piss on the cat. Basically adapt your laugh to the image that you want to give, while keeping in mind that your hand shouldn’t get in front of your mouth as you laugh, the sound should be a tinsel.

Have a good body language.

That’s the hardest, as it’s very hard to control and will take you time. I’m not telling you to look like Brap Pitt in Fight Club, it’s a movie. Some people are able to identify themselves to a character in a movie, it’s easy to spot them, they’re usually charismatic for a short amount of time, and then when out of their comfort zone, their shyness take over and they look like an animal that hasn’t been fed by mummy. They’re my favorite victims.
I strongly believe that people who have a too « charismatic » body language at first are people who used to identify themselves with someone of a movie or someone that they used to look up to (therefore not the real person) and became something that they see as « it » but became victim of their own ego and can’t get out of it. They might look amazing, but how can you look so different whe you grew up in a normal environment? Only the dreams took you where you are. If you fake something with conviction, it can become you. That’s the bottom of the bottom, the depression will never be far. Haha, you deserve it dickhead.Or not!

Only when you’ll know how to do all this and use it on people, you’ll become yourself. It’s not necessarily worth it, but it can be.

People make you. So never be ashamed when on your own to dance like a moron on britney spears, or look at yourself in the mirror while doing some weird faces or shoving your fingers up your nose and shouting like a new-born, doing private jokes, when masturbating yourself, or whatever you do on your own, because that’s you being beautiful. Just keep it for yourself… Y’ know ?!

Go buy yourself some chocolate now, it’s good for you.

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